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 | As I Was Saying...: Free Coaching... yes, Free Coaching! |
 Just over a day ago, I offered free coaching to five people who were keen to take it on, and if you missed it, here is what the deal was...
Free Coaching... yes, Free Coaching!
Yep, its totally true.
No catches, No contracts. I am offering 5 coaching spots to whoever picks them up. First in, First served. 3 months forum coaching.
Whats needed and wanted?
Well you have to want to change your situation. So if you are prepared to make a move on whatever you want to move on, I am here to offer you my skills as a Coach. Even if you are struggling with the concept of coaching, what have you got to loose?
Nothing more needed than that. The coaching will be entirely forum based (restricted to you and I for confidentiality.) To grab a spot, become a member and then fill out this form with your username and that you wish to take up the coaching offer. (You can even remain anonymous apart from your username) I will then activate your personal forum space and we'll get into it.
So you are still thinking theres a catch? Its your choice and this offer will be picked up pretty quickly. The only way I can prove there's no catch is for you to try it.
cheers... Bill
Well the places were snapped up fast...
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Posted by billgray on Monday, January 30 @ 02:18:03 CST (1251 reads)
(Read More... | 2049 bytes more | 17 comments | As I Was Saying... | Score: 2.96)
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| Project Information: Because we all want to make it easier... |
I have a few spaces left in my Resolution Course that is to start shortly.
If you or someone you know, would like to participate, then please feel free. It is a complimentary course.
Click on the Read More (below) to find out more...
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Posted by billgray on Tuesday, February 15 @ 17:58:16 CST (657 reads)
(Read More... | 776 bytes more | 4 comments | Project Information | Score: 0)
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| Writing: Articles |
Many of the articles you are reading on this site are published on other sites as well.
ComputerCops have an archive of all my articles posted on their website
tankweb.net also post my articles
cheers... Bill
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Posted by billgray on Thursday, July 01 @ 22:23:41 CDT (676 reads)
(Read More... | 1 comment | Writing | Score: 0)
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| Project Information: Attraction- Establish a Substantial Reserve follow up |
On Mondays call we worked through the ideas associated with having a superreserve in every areas of your life as a way to increase your attractiveness.
Reserve means to have more than you need. A super reserve is to have heaps more than you' 'll ever need.
An helpful image is of the ant storing for the rainy day and mere survival and the Reserve Bank….has it could ever want and need.
Superreserve puts the urge and pressure to physically survive at rest.
The benefits of creating reserve are tremendous...
(less worry and concern; it stops neediness; reduces fear of survival; puts one at choice; quality of life; more time and peace of mind; more relaxed; less busyness; less stress)
With a reserve you are more attractive.
Creating a reserve enhances your quality of life. Less fear is key to having a better life.
It is not that having a reserve makes you more attractive. It is how you change and evolve during the process of building a reserve is what matters most, although quantity does help/accelerate you becoming Irrisistably Attractive. It is the BENEFIT which comes with the reserves rather than the quantity. Reduce the struggle and eliminate fear. More time space and freedom.
How does one build a Reserve at all?
What gets in the way of building it quickly?
How do you know when you have a Reserve?
What does it feel like?
What are the holes in your life which are letting the reserves you do accumulate drain out?
You know you are on track when:
You are saving instead of spending, and you enjoy it!
You are less affected by life' 's problems because you have confidence that comes with reserve.
You feel more generous because you realize you can afford to be.
You will have dollars in the bank with no need for it.
Creating a reserve is a process and requires a system. Need to practice repetitive actions. Take an action each day.
What areas of your life do you see a reserve important?
(physical, emotional, financial, spiritual, mental)
(Reserves of time, space and freedom)
How are you going to organise these areas so there is a reserve?
Also, we wish to thank you all for being with us on this attraction teleforum. It has been our pleasure to present you with these concepts and we trust you will find untold uses a ways to enhance your life so you do become more attractive.
We would appreciate your feed back to the questions below;
What has been the benefit of doing this work on Becoming Attractive?
How will you use this in the future?
Who else might be interested?
In the Company of Coaches wants to offer this program to individuals and groups, as well as 1:1 coaching. How can you help us do this?
Once again thank you for your participation
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Posted by billgray on Friday, November 28 @ 18:02:02 CST (615 reads)
(Read More... | 2 comments | Project Information | Score: 0)
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| Project Information: Attraction- Establish a Substantial Reserve |
ATTRACTION
Session 4 (written by Fleur Dwyer)
Welcome
Work in the field(of all possibilities)viz responding vs reacting:
What did you notice around reacting(vs responding)?
What kinds of things caused reaction?
What causes us to overreact rather than overrespond?
What types of situations would you choose to overrespond to?
What are the warning signs that a reaction is on the way?
Tonight' 's teleforum is about establishing a superreserve in every areas of your life as a way to increase your attractiveness.
Reserve means to have more than you need. A super reserve is to have heaps more than you' 'll ever need.
An helpful image is of the ant storing for the rainy day and mere survival and the Reserve Bank….has it could ever want and need.
Superreserve puts the urge and pressure to physically survive at rest.
What do you see as the benefits of creating reserve?
(less worry and concern; stops neediness; reduces fear of survival; puts one at choice; quality of life; more time and peace of mind; more relaxed; less busyness; less stress)
What areas of your life do you see a reserve important?
(physical, emotional, financial, spiritual, mental)
(Reserves of time, space and freedom)
With a reserve you are more attractive.
Creating a reserve enhances your quality of life. Less fear is key to having a better life.
It is not that having a reserve makes you more attractive. It is how you change and evolve during the process of building a reserve is what matters most, although quantity does help/accelerate you becoming IA. It is the BENEFIT which comes with the reserves rather than the quantity. Reduce the struggle and eliminate fear. More time space and freedom.
How does one build a Reserve at all?
What gets in the way of building it quickly?
How do you know when you have a Reserve?
What does it feel like?
What are the holes in your life which are letting the reserves you do accumulate drain out?
You know you are on track when:
You are saving instead of spending, and you enjoy it!
You are less affected by life' 's problems because you have confidence that comes with reserve.
You feel more generous because you realize you can afford to be.
You will have dollars in the bank with no need for it.
Creating a reserve is a process and requires a system. Need to practice repetitive actions. Take an action each day.
What has been the benefit of doing this work on Becoming Attractive?
How will you use this in the future?
Who else might be interested?
In the Company of Coaches wants to offer this program to individuals and groups, as well as 1:1 coaching. How can you help us do this?
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Posted by billgray on Sunday, November 16 @ 22:29:18 CST (639 reads)
(Read More... | 1 comment | Project Information | Score: 0)
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| Project Information: Attraction- Shifting from Reacting to Responding Week 3 Follow up |
Hi Fellow Attractionists,
Last night we discovered that Attraction is a personal topic which affects each of us in different ways. I am impressed by the amount of commitment to this journey by each of us and the amount you have been prepared to share has shown just how the journey is going.
During the first part of the call we had a review of the "Perfect the Present" idea. I noted with interest the amount of times the concept of having more time came up as we moved closer to being in the present and the amount of SELF-ishness that was able to occur when time was available. It is valuable to note that the more we can bring ourselves into the present, the more we appear to gain the time to create.
This concept bought us straight into the next step in the Attraction Process, Shifting from Reactive to Responsive.
The definition of these two words were discussed and I have also included one here;
Reaction:
To be subjected to a feeling or compelled to action in answer to something; this can limit attraction.
Response:
An action or behavior in answer to something; responding helps us attract better.
People respond with their soul, their inner self, people react with their mind. People respond when they have time and there is no threat (or at the earliest stages of a threat) People react when its too late. You know its a response when you have plenty of time to make changes, to correct something, to protect yourself or to create something. If its instinctive, its a reaction likely based on some threat
Reaction: What happens automatically following a stimulus
Response: What happens after you have time to ask a question and act consciously
Over-response: What happens when you shape your response to address the deepest causes of what has happened or what you have felt.
The attractiveness of each of us is enhanced by the amount of attention we put into responding and overresponding to areas that affect us (and others) Responding changes the dynamics of how others act as well. Once we have moved forward towards responding, the effect we create is tenfold.
With these three points alone (Selfishness, Perfect Present and Responding) we already are perfectly placed to attract more of what we wish rather than be the effect of our surroundings.
Action Steps to Take this week:
· When you find yourself in reaction, involve yourself in it fully. Go to “wow, what is this”? Be curious like a child in a candy store. Move into the observation to learn more about yourself.
· Notice how often you react vs. respond. · What kinds of things cause you to be reactive?
· Consciously over-respond to either a problem or an opportunity.
· Be prepared to share the results of your work with the class.
Also remember to carry on with the work, perfecting the present and becoming more selfish.
If you have any discoveries and/or questions please feel free to write or ask Fleur or myself. We are here to create the space for you to look, learn, experiment and attract what is great for you.
Have a great week
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Posted by billgray on Monday, November 10 @ 19:50:26 CST (636 reads)
(Read More... | 7 comments | Project Information | Score: 0)
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| Project Information: Attraction- Shifting from Reacting to Responding |
How did you find the concept of living in the Present? What happened during the week when you were conscious of being in the present?
So as you can see by the examples, there is alot to be said for this "being in the Present" "Perfecting the Present"
I am reading a book at the moment called "Clients Forever" and it is working the idea that for anyone to be successful in what they do, they must create relationships rather than sell things or make things. If you can create this relationship, you will have a client for life, whatever your profession or career.
As you can imagine, the idea sounds great in theory and moving onto putting the idea into practice, well thats another story... or is it?
The book explains the idea of creating this relationship. It first of all asks you to clear yourself up, get yourself in the present, get clear on who you are... in other words, Become SELFish and Be in the Present.
Now I want everyone to hold your hand out in front of you, palm upwards, fingers gently curled up, as if you are holding a big lump of dough. Now in this hand is all the reasons under the sun why you don't live the life you wish, all the reasons why you don't live in the present, all the reasons why you dont live SELFishly.
These are ideas like...
Its just the way I am
I'm still better off than most people
Well, I'm happy, aren't I?
I'll be able to retire early
How do you know, anyway?
Its not worth being too successful, you pay too much tax
are you starting to get the idea???
So all those ideas, excuses and the like are cupped in your hand right now. What I want you to do is to now, holding your hand as if its holding all these ideas, put it over your face, clamp it on and look out at the view. Pretty difficult, aye?
You see, thats how we are looking at the world, through all these ideas. Its like, as you can see, there are plenty of dark spots blocking the view
All those dark spots are getting in the way of perfecting in the present.
So lets get down and personal
What are some examples of these dark spots in your life?
they are like the tentacles of a squid stuck on your face, sure you pull a few off but before you know it, they have crept back up on there
get a few examples
Now lets have a look at removing a few of these tentacles stuck on our face, how do we do this?
What if we were to work them with some coaching?
get a coaching situation and coach it. explain as we go along, about action, about the coaching process and continue the coaching to a result of action to move forward from the example to handle it
As you can see, what we are hoping to achieve is moving from reacting to the situation with guns blazing, using the squid stuck on our face through to responding (without tentacles) to what is really there.
This brings us to the third part of being attractive
reactive v responsive
Lets look at these two words, what would be some examples of the two??
discuss the ideas that come up
People respond with their soul, their inner self, people react with their mind. People respond when they have time and there is no threat (or at the earliest stages of a threat) People react when its too late. You know its a response when you have plenty of time to make changes, to correct something, to protect yourself or to create something. If its instinctive, its a reaction likely based on some threat
Reaction: What happens automatically following a stimulus
Response: What happens after you have time to ask a question and act consciously
Over-response: What happens when you shape your response to address the deepest causes of
what has happened or what you have felt
Action Steps to Take:
· When you find yourself in reaction, involve yourself in it fully. Go to “wow, what is this”? Be
curious like a child in a candy store. Move into the observation to learn more about yourself.
· Notice how often you react vs. respond.
· What kinds of things cause you to be reactive?
· Consciously over-respond to either a problem or an opportunity.
· Be prepared to share the results of your work with the class.
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Posted by billgray on Saturday, November 08 @ 19:35:45 CST (632 reads)
(Read More... | 6 comments | Project Information | Score: 0)
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| Project Information: Attraction Teleclass... Perfect the Present follow up |
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Hi there,
Thank you all for an inspiring class last night. I say inspiring due to three reasons in particular. The first is that I see so many "presentations and seminars" advertised, all professing things like "find out the secrets of..... " discover the seven points to true happiness" and so on.
What we found out last night, is that each of us already have a wealth of secrets that will bring us the desired results. Making that happen took up most of the discussion last night. The discussion around "The present is perfect"
While we continue to focus on making sure our future is going to be perfect and putting our attention on the past performances of our life, we are missing the very part of our life that enables us to do both those things, The Present. Right here and now allows us the opportunity to look to the future and relive the past and it also allows us the privilege of Enjoying the situation we have right now. That is this time called the present.
While we live in this present time, how much of it do we actually spend here?
The second reason I was inspired is that I find that learning is a lifelong experience. Last nights class showed me that the excitement and challenges of the journey should not be missed due to being so intent on making the destination. Opportunities abound, or so I am told. My question to myself is "why don't they happen to me?" Why is it that I don't see what is there, in front of my face? Where is my attention if its not right here and now?
All these questions and not one answer. or is it more that I am not accepting the answers I am being given?
The third reason I was inspired by the class... I am amazed at how much help I receive from each and every one of you. There is simply no reason why we have to do this journey called life by ourselves, and definitely no reason why we should. Listening to each experience, each question, each enquiry enables another little cog to fall into place. As we discover truths about ourselves so to are we opening the door for others to discover for themselves. It is what we DO with that discovery, that will determine our success in our own achievements. The commitment to becoming more attractive is more than a thought. It is an action, it is an action that will lead you away from mediocrity, lead you away from the same old, same old, and deliver you to being the person you truly deserve to be.
So thank you for an inspiring teleclass. I invite you to really get your teeth into the Present....
Action Steps to Take:
· Try spending one day a week without goals. Simply respond to the messages
you get from inside
you and around you. See what this feels like.
· Pay attention to your thoughts for 15 minutes a day for the first three
days of next week (check your watch or timer). What percentage of your
thoughts related to the past, present, or future?
· For the next three days, do your best to let go of thoughts of the past
and future.
Does this make you feel different?
Does this make you more or less effective in your daily life?
Also please keep working on becoming more SELF-ish. If you have any questions, queries or just wish to respond please feel free to email Fleur or myself. I really enjoy hearing your feedback.
"See you" on next Mondays call
Cheers
Bill and Fleur
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Posted by billgray on Monday, November 03 @ 19:31:10 CST (650 reads)
(Read More... | 1 comment | Project Information | Score: 0)
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| Project Information: Attraction Teleclass Perfect the Present |
Welcome to week two of the Attraction teleclass.
Discussion:
How did everyone get on with being SELF-ish?
What kinds of reactions came up for you and how did you manage them? (As you become selfish, you' 'll probably notice more about the type of person you' 've attracted. Usually, people have attracted others who need them to NOT be selfish, in other words, need people. See how the cycle is perpetuated….TL)
Were there any changes you made that created a feeling of SELF-ishness?
How will you keep these changes in place? (In order for you to attract stuff, there has to be a you. Some people aren' 't selfish enough to have developed a complete sense of themselves. The understanding and practice of this principle will strengthen this part of yourself.)
I can see that you have made some great steps forward, if only by concentrating on the subject of SELF-ishness and looking.
Our next step is to continue on, in the vein of being more SELF-ish and now build into this...
The idea that the PRESENT IS PERFECT!!!
Now the definition for "the present is perfect" is...
Everything that' 's around you is there for a reason. Everything has something to teach you, if only you
listen. The lessons that are waiting for you are the right ones for you now.
Now when I say, the present is perfect, what does that bring to the surface for you?
What ideas are you thinking?
With the definition in mind, what are the things that are happening around you that lead you to think "its about time I learnt the lesson there"
The skill we wish to move into possessing is
You will attract more when you perfect what you already have. When you see and accept that
the current time, situation, accomplishment or problem really is perfect, even if it doesn' 't feel that way, you are then free to let it be or to take action to create a better present. You are aligning yourself with what is so vs. what should, was or could be. When you are fully engaged in what comes to you in the present, then you make yourself open to the changes that will make the future even better. As you live this process, you become a model in perfecting the present.
With all this in mind, lets carry out an exercise,
take a piece of paper and draw two circles of about equal size side by side, take up most the page.
divide the first circle into roughly three equal parts by drawing two horizontal lines through the circle and label each section past, present, future.
Then do the same with the second circle but this time make sure the divisions with a small past, a big present and a small future.
Now lets look at these two circles, how are we going to get this shift happening?
Moving from circle one to circle two?
What percentage of our time are we spending in the present, past, or future?
What must happen to live in the present?
What is present perfect for you?
How are you stopping yourself from living in the present?
In order to make the changes necessary to become more attractive, you must pay attention to what' 's happening to you and around you RIGHT NOW. Attraction LIVES in the moment, not in the future, and so should you.
Are you responding fully to both the problems and the opportunities that are occurring right now in your space? The present, rather than the future, is where you start to make changes so that attraction can find you. The ultimate change that you can make in your mindset, home, career, life, habits so as to become more attractive is to change your relationship with the future (and the past) and to engage fully in what' 's taking place in the present.
Lets have a look at the past and the future
we are heading from "the future will be perfect" to the "present is perfect"
Agendas, to-do lists, striving, pushing, commitments, goals and external benchmarks are all about the past and the future. Attraction, however, is about the present and requires that you be living in the present before you' 'll attract what' 's best for you. If your to-do list or must accomplish list, etc. is pressing, the best of what could come to you won' 't. This is because you' 're too full. In order to be attractive, you need to have room for what you want to attract. (If there was no future, what would you do differently, today?
What makes the future more interesting than the present for you?
Are you creating the future, or is your present creating the future?
What goals do you have that you' 've been ‘seduced' ' into setting/wanting?)
What we need to do to live in the Present is:
· Accept the past
· Give up hope for a better past
· Let go of the future
· Surrender the future to your Higher Power
· Trust the process in the moment
· Live life fully in the moment
· Know that everything is perfect just the way it is Right Now (Yes, you do have to plan well for the future, that' 's being smart and responsible for the present…it is about not planning your life away, being so focused on becoming successful, that life passes you by.
When the present is perfect the future is redundant….let go of striving.
Use this principle to disengage from the If/Then trap…this formula is very expensive…get more, do more and become more)
Living in the present is an important part of Attraction. When you are really in the present , you are more able to enjoy what is around you. You are more able to receive the messages that are coming to you all the time - from what' 's outside of you and from what' 's inside of you. If you are too focused on the past, which is gone - or the future – which isn' 't here yet, you won' 't be able to offer your full attention to who and what is with you NOW. It is that full attention which makes you more attractive and which gives you what you need to fully and freely respond to what is in the present. Let go of what keeps you in the past or future and out of the present. Be in the NOW and enjoy it!! Become Irresistibly Attractive!
Action Steps to Take:
· Try spending one day a week without goals. Simply respond to the messages you get from inside
you and around you. See what this feels like.
· Pay attention to your thoughts for 15 minutes a day for the first three days of next week (check your watch or timer). What percentage of your thoughts related to the past, present, or future?
· For the next three days, do your best to let go of thoughts of the past and future.
Does this make you feel different?
Does this make you more or less effective in your daily life?
(Look out for sadness, confusion, boredom)
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Posted by billgray on Saturday, November 01 @ 19:19:19 CST (637 reads)
(Read More... | 7 comments | Project Information | Score: 0)
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| Project Information: Attraction Teleclass Self-ish |
Self-ishness
Lets have a look at this... When I first heard "Selfishness" I had all sorts of reactions. I could here my Mother telling me to stop being so selfish, I could hear all the times when I did something, and it was viewed as if, because I was doing something for myself, I was putting myself before the rest of the world ... and that was wrong.
It wasn't until I cleared my head and listened to the definition
SELF-ishness.... Self Care,
Its the action of investing in your soul, spirit, needs, your own personal foundation and life.
Its your total health and emotional balance
Once I finally GOT that definition, I could see that I had to move from
The old definition through to the new definition
From
small s >>>> Capital S
unhealthy >>>> healthy
external motivation >>>> Internal motivation
Ego >>>> Self
Not enough >>>> Reserve
Neediness >>>> Needs met
So taking this further, its been found that choice is paramount to taking control of this area. Once you have moved from...
Not realising that choices exist >>>> Selecting among choices.
You are on the road to attracting the very things you wish rather than going after something you haven't defined as yours.
(maybe a discussion here around selfish >>>> Self-ish)
So you can see that there are a number of points we need to get clarity around, you know, get totally clear in our own head as to what and how we are going to start this attraction process. There are so many things we need to sort out....
Well NO, not at all. The first step is realise that Self- ish, this self care is the cornerstone of this Attraction Process.
Getting your needs met and building a reserve
Its moving from defending what you do, defending self >>>>>> Honouring what you do, honouring Self
Its "not bashing yourself up" sure we all have areas that we know we need to make changes to....
I had some mates over from NZ last weekend and as is usually the case we catch up at a pub, watch some rugby and have an ale, maybe two which leads to three or four, five Its always a great idea at the time but man oh man, was I crook the next day and then I caught up with them the next night as well. its like, here I was, what I would call, a trashed unit, throwing all my beliefs out the window.
If you had of seen me then, you would have though I was just a loser, Not attractive in one small way
My point being, what are the areas that you know about yourself, deep down, that represent that person, that drunk you thought was the unattractive loser. What is the area that is makes you unattractive. WOW, now we have to start taking steps towards being truthful. But remember, this is being truthful to ourselves, honouring self, rather than defending self
I could defend my self , you know my mates only come over once or twice a year. I wasn't that drunk, I had a great time it goes on
or I could move to a point where I honour my self,
Now where does that take me..... its takes me to being responsible for my actions, I can see a healthier way to enjoy the night. It reveals the choices I have.... Drink one or two, drink 10, drink none. We don't need to bash ourselves up here, we need to honour our SELF.
We have to get out of 'doing the same old thing and expecting a different result' Its an action... Doing Something Different, not the things that are going well but the things that make us unattractive to ourselves
Its getting your needs met
Its Building a reserve,
Its practicing extreme self care
Its action. People see action, people like being with you because what they see in you is what they want in themselves (they have some work to do on their Self ishness hehe)
When you become very SELF-ish you know what you want and you are willing to express that. You become very empowering to the people around you. People relax and are attracted to you when you are secure with
Who you are
what you want
what you expect from them
Now I mentioned before that reserves are the key
Needs tend to break up reserves. If you are needy you spend your reserves very quickly Lets look at needs
(discussion around what needs are and building up reserves)
Once we become truly self-ish a remarkable thing happens, the care and generosity towards others improves as well,
A natural giving and receiving takes place
Your cup runs over with extra reserves
People can freely take advantage of this extra without any risk to you
Extra reserves are perceived as consequences of abundance rather than neediness
People will be naturally attracted to you
Around the class for comments, gems of discovery
Now all this takes action on your part. It can be thinking action and mostly it is action action. Its stepping forward. During the next week, I want, I NEED (smile) you to find three areas of your life that you need to take better care of yourself.
Do something Self-ish in each of these areas once a day for at least three days of the week
Observe how you get on, what occurred, feelings etc
Be prepared to share your experiences next week
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Posted by billgray on Monday, October 27 @ 00:21:54 CST (618 reads)
(Read More... | 2 comments | Project Information | Score: 0)
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